Sometimes you just need to communicate a subject to someone knowing that the outcome is likely to be unpleasant.
My young adult son said, in that circumstance his approach is to say, “This (description of situation) is the way things need to be and this is what is happening instead. This needs to change.”
I shared with him the anxiety I often feel, especially in a situation like that, regarding hurting people’s feelings–even if my position is the better one. I don’t ever want to be the cause of making someone hurt or angry or sad. I know that is unrealistic, but when I say something wrong or hurtful, especially if it is inadvertent, I feel badly inside for a very long time.
My wise young son said that if I say something hurtful, that just makes me “Normal”.
He said, “Then you can go to the other person and apologize or try to fix it, or if you don’t have the opportunity to redress the wrong—either way–you tell Heavenly Father about it. You ask for forgiveness from Him and repent. When you repent it makes you “Above Normal” and you are closer to becoming like God, closer to Him. If we never did things that needed to be repented of we wouldn’t be able to grow and we wouldn’t be able to come closer to God.”
He continued in saying that one thing he figured out was that repentance wasn’t just for big mistakes and sins, it was for everything. Repentance is something you do daily like brushing and flossing your teeth.
It’s not necessary to have a root canal every day or have a tooth pulled or cavity filled daily, but you need to floss every day. If you don’t floss your teeth for a while, it might hurt when you do it, you might even bleed a little but if you get back in the habit of flossing every day, pretty soon it doesn’t hurt and you have stronger gums and clean teeth.
Daily repentance is like that. If you don’t do it for a while, things can build up and repentance can be painful and difficult, but doing it daily for even small things, even things that we feel hurt or inadequate over, can help us be spiritually healthy.
Repairing the hurt inside, a daily humble connection to God through repentance; I think being spiritually healthy is a much better way to exist.